English
And when I was just about to affirm that I can see a better world, I just happened to be the protagonist of a not-so-nice moment. Shall I tell you?

Recently I've got a book as a reward about HIV+ teens integration in the society that I've already finished. But hence I'm pretty lazy at home, I read it in the subways and buses.

And as I was sitting on one of the seats Saturday Morning reading the book, 2 guys get closer to me and start talking. Soon one of them leans over to see what I'm reading. Surprisingly is not the fact that they were like "HIV!!!?" but that they started talking about me, right next to me, and I could hear it all!

"Can't you see how he looks? That's it, if he fucked his mouth up... He should learn how to use a condom." So this is what I could understand from what he said:

1. First off, definitely, I am HIV+/ I have AIDS because I'm reading a book. Which also means that if you read a crimes book you're a criminal or if you buy a porn magazine you are a porn star.

2. I'm ugly as hell. Can't you see how I look? Like I'm the ugliest person in the whole world.
And just when I thought I was looking pretty decent. Of course I'm ugly because of first point.

3. I had my mouth fucked... which means I'm a cunt at my age. Obviously, if you read a book about HIV you have already fucked with the whole city, you have no idea what is a condom and how to use it and that you, summing them all up, are HIV+ and/or have AIDS and are a cunt.

4. Definitely, HIV and AIDS cannot be contacted through injections, transfusions, birth, or any other place from where you could contact infected blood. Nooo way, sir! Only if you get your mouth fucked (so if you're gay, hence I'm a boy)... hopefully, straight people are safe. They can't contact the virus. So pure and innocent they are!

5.And because all of the above requirements are accomplished, yeah, I deserve being labeled in public as ugly, gay, bitch and HIV+, considering I was reading a pretty interesting book about the virus, the syndrome, about the infection, transmission, mentalities, treatment, and these people integration in this *modern* society which it's pretty clear for me that barely has an idea about the virus and the illness.

I can say that not their mentality has surprised me, but how they started talking about it right next to me, calling me ugly, gay, bitch and ill (insinuating of course). I was not sad, but rather amused. I kept on reading my book, when one of them leaned over and started reading a long. I started smiling despite the earlier conversation between them, and when I finished reading the page, I waited for him to finish it too. He started laughing and said I could turn the page... that's when I said: "You know, I don't have HIV, so relax." He didn't say anything, but kept on reading.

"We should read more about this stuff, you never know..." the other one said, the one who insinuated I'm a ugly, perverted, ill cunt. Then the first one replied "What do you do if a car hits you? Do you read a boook?".

So in other words, sexual acts were and are accidents. XD Ok, if they say so...

When I was just about to leave the train, finishing the page, he looks at me and I try to give him a hint that I have to go and that's when he says "Oh, you have to go." and I said "Yes...". I got on my feet and left smiling.

And this was the scene in a half-full subway, Saturday morning.

Just a little question. If just by reading a book I was labeled as "HIV+", "Gay", "Bitch" and insinuated I'm "Ugly", then hell, I wonder how do these guys feel ? How do they feel knowing they have to struggle between their infection and/or illness and the society that won't try to understand the real reasons behind their situation.

I promised myself I will keep on reading and get informed in order to help. I want to change the world in something lil' better.

Dec. 1^st - World AIDS Day.